Enemy of intelligence

So yesterday, you may have heard about some idiot on Facebook posting a poll called "Should Obama be killed?" Pretty serious stuff, but it's the internet, right? People post crazy stuff all the time and it's not fair to make assumptions about many people based on the actions of one. But what happens when an elected official does something similar, just less blatant?

Here's congressman Trent Franks (R-AZ), calling the President of the United States an "enemy of humanity."



What kind of message does that send to the lunatics from the teabagging crowd? You know the people with their signs like "We came unarmed... this time!" and "Obama's Plan = White Slavery," how do you think this kind of statement resonates with them? This goes beyond the right-wing's efforts to make the President seem illegitimate by saying things like he's "exotic" or "different," this is a government official telling people that the President of the United States is an enemy to our very existence.

Think I'm overreacting? What about the census worker who was found bound, gagged and hanged with the word "FED" carved into his chest last week? This, just a month or so after congresswoman Michele Bachmann (R-MN) claimed that filling out the census could lead to Americans being sent to internment camps, much like we did with Japanese-Americans during World War II.

Trent Franks is walking on very dangerous ground here. This is worse than the birth certificate numbskulls and makes "YOU LIE!" seem tame in comparison, Congressman Franks isn't saying Barack Obama is unfit for office, he's saying he's unfit for life. This isn't just a political disagreement, Franks is dehumanizing our democratically elected President, illustrating him as an evil monster. When you start using language like that, you're essentially telling people that it would be okay to assassinate the President. You're giving them the idea that they would be the hero, saving the "real Americans" from the threat of an enemy to humanity. With rhetoric like this, and the non-stop comparisons to Hitler, all it's going to take is one unbalanced lunatic to hear Trent Franks' words and create a very dangerous situation. Franks should resign immediately or be removed from office by the people of Arizona, language like this cannot be tolerated.

Liberal Media vs. Conservative Media

I know I talk about the myth of a liberal media on a fairly regular basis. It's not that there aren't any liberals in the media, but they're generally interested in presenting the truth. Contrary to popular (stupid) belief, there's not a concentrated effort within the collective media to promote left-wing agendas. However, there is a concentrated effort in the conservative media to promote right-wing agendas, except they have no interest in the truth. The right-wing media has not use for facts because the truth usually contradicts their agenda, so instead they rely on loud noises, smears and flat-out insanity.

Let's contrast and compare! First, here's Bill Moyers, the epitome of the "liberal media," and a man that Bill O'Reilly constantly rails against and sends his stalker producer to harass:

Bill Maher interviews Bill Moyers

Now just watch those clips with Maher and Moyers and understand that this is the "liberal media" - intelligent, well-spoken, fair and coherent conversation.

And now here's the conservative media:

Glenn Beck pretends to light someone on fire

Glenn Beck boils "fake" frog on air

Glenn Beck claims the half-white president "has a deep-seated hatred for white people"

Glenn Beck jokes about poisoning the Speaker of the House

Glenn Beck says he's "thinking about killing" Michael Moore

Glenn Beck agrees that we need Osama bin Laden to "detonate a major weapon" on US soil

This is the best the right-wing media can do, folks. Lies, threats, hypocrisy, fear, racism, and ludicrous stunts. Hell, it's not just their media, it's the right-wing in general.

Why so serious?

Okay, I need a break. You'd be surprised, but tackling the insanity of the right-wing is exhausting when there's just so much of it. So today, I've decided to take on an easy target, this whole fad of Photoshopping Obama as The Joker:


Honestly, I don't really have a problem with this. I don't find it offensive, it's not like when the wingnuts try to make him look like Hitler, and making politicians look like cartoon villains is actually pretty funny:


See? Hilarious! But Jokerbama? I think these posters are good evidence that right-wingers aren't particularly deep and not a lot of thought goes into their outrage. It's not surprising, the Republican Party has gotten people to vote against their own self-interests for decades, just by drumming up irrelevant issues like guns and religion. Yeah, I said it, the right-wing voters cling to guns and religion.

Anyway, why The Joker? Joker is the exact opposite of everything the right-wing claims Obama is doing. Right now, the current lunacy coming from the teabaggers is that Obama is some kind of socialist, communist, tyrannical fascist dictator, that's going to tax you into oblivion and take over American business. Obviously that's absurd, but I'll humor them for a moment... how is that at all related to The Joker? Let's get nerdy!

The Joker has no interest in power, control or money, his only desire is absolute chaos. Yeah, he steals money, but it's only to achieve a goal, he doesn't care about wealth. Go watch The Dark Knight again, once he has all the money from every criminal organization in Gotham City, he simply sets it ablaze! The Joker wants a world that's as crazy as him, he's a terrorist more in line with extreme Libertarianism, so shouldn't we be painting smiles on Ron Paul?

But according to the wingnuts, Obama is now a socialist, communist, fascist, tyrant who wants the country to descend into anarchy. Huh? This is why I have such a hard time taking these people seriously, because they obviously don't know what they're talking about. It's bad enough they're claiming Obama is both a socialist and a fascist, but a tyrannical anarchist? In the words of The Joker: HAhAHahAHAHaHAHahaHAhA!

If you want to dip into Batman's rogues gallery to smear President Obama, may I suggest someone more in line with your ridiculous claims? How about The Penguin? A wealthy, high-society elitist who gains wealth and power through less than legal means. Oh dammit, I just described the Republican Party.

You lie!

If you've been following the news today, congress officially brought up the Joe "You Lie" Wilson situation and voted on whether or not to rebuke him. While I'm all for making this guy look like the assclown that he is, I have to ask, if the guy was willing to apologize, would anyone even want it? A Joe Wilson apology is worth as much as his opinion: nothing.

His outburst during the Obama's speech did serve a purpose though, it proved my point that the Republican Party has no respect for the President or the office he holds. Hell, they obviously don't even have any respect for the House of Representatives, as he blatantly defied the rules and very few Republicans are calling for him to apologize on the floor or to resign. And yes, Wilson should resign, or be removed from office, no one so childish should be allowed to have such an important job. Try pulling that stunt at your place of employment; the next time the boss calls a meeting, shout "YOU LIE!" at him during an important point, you'll be cleaning out your desk before lunch.

It also doesn't help the fact that it wasn't Obama who was lying, it was Joe Wilson! Well, either he lied or he was just flat-out wrong, which makes him a perfect fit for the GOP. Liars, idiots and crazy people, hell of a party they got there. Which brings me back to my original point, why would anyone even care if Wilson apologizes? As a member of the GOP, his apology will be insincere, just like everything else that comes out of that party's collective mouth.

It's fun to watch the right-wing defend this guy, the first elected official in the history of the country to shout at the president mid-sentence during a speech to congress. I've seen some people try to play the "British Parliament" excuse, saying outbursts like that happen all the time over there. So I suppose anyone using that excuse also believes in Britain's National Healthcare System? And naturally, now the Republicans are playing the victim card, whining that the Democrats are turning this into a "political stunt." Uh... yeah, "political stunt" is the very definition of what Joe Wilson did; there are consequences for acting like an idiot, just ask Kanye West. I know it happened on the sacred grounds of the MTV Video Music Awards, but isn't it funny that the entire country can agree that Kanye was a jerk over something so trivial, but we're struggling to come to a consensus about the southern politician with a history of racially-charged remarks interrupting the first black president?

Intellectual Truancy

It's a sad state of affairs when the president speaking to children about staying in school becomes politicized by the right-wing smear machine. I understand why the LOUD NOISES crowd is encouraging parents to keep their kids home from school tomorrow, without the stupid and ignorant, the GOP would lose 90% of their votes and talk radio would lose 100% of its listeners. But what is truly saddening, is that the "liberal media" (lol) is buying into this nonsense (again) and presenting it as legitimate news (again).

After reading the speech (here's the transcript), it's painfully obvious that there is absolutely no controversy here. I don't consider "stay in school" to be controversial, I suppose if you're Sarah Palin, who presided over the state with the highest dropout rate in the country, you could get a little upset. Obviously, this is probably the least controversial thing any president could do, especially considering that George W. Bush, George H.W. Bush and Ronald Reagan all did it, but its only "politicizing education" when the black Democrat does it. Hmmm. By the way, when Reagan spoke to school children, he went off on a tangent about tax rates, but no politics there, right? It's the Gipper!

All this business about "brainwashing" and "Hitler Youth" (yeah, wingnuts are playing the Hitler card again), it's all just another part of the right-wing's concentrated effort to make Obama seem illegitimate. They have zero respect for the man or the office he holds. I'd like to think that it has to do with something other than his race, but I honestly can't come up with anything else.

And before any wingnut jumps in with their list of idiocy, let me stop them right now: Obama's not that liberal, the economy sucked long before he was elected, our spending has been out of control for 25 years (at least now we're spending it domestically instead of in George W. Bush's sandbox), and we're nowhere near "socialism," no matter how much they scream it.

The country is no different than it was on January 19th, so to throw this kind of temper tantrum over something as non-controversial as this, leads me to believe their problems are entirely with the man himself. Not his policies, not his message, just the fact that they can't wrap their feeble little brains around the idea of a leader named Barack Hussein Obama. To hate a President so much that you can't even allow your children to hear him promote a message of "stay in school and work hard"? Yeah, that certainly strikes at something a bit more personal than the friggin' deficit.

Teabaggers: The First Generation

Our current political climate isn't the first time the extreme right-wing used the threat of communism to stop America's progression:


And here we are today:


Poor, pitiful, angry white men... they've always had it so rough.

The Cult

No, I'm not talking about the kickass rock band that gave us tunes like "Fire Woman" or "She Sells Sanctuary," I'm talking about the Republican Party, which is beginning to resemble something along the lines of Heaven's Gate. You remember that, right? The crazy people who all killed themselves because they were going to hitch a ride on the Hale-Bopp Comet? Let's contrast and compare for a moment:

Heaven's Gate:
"It is also possible that part of our test of faith is our hating this world, even our flesh body, to the extent to be willing to leave it without any proof of the Next Level's existence."

Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann (R-Arkham Asylum):
"This [health care reform] cannot pass…What we have to do today is make a covenant, to slit our wrists, be blood brothers on this thing. This will not pass. We will do whatever it takes to make sure this doesn’t pass…Right now, we are looking at reaching down the throat and ripping the guts out of freedom."

Remember, people voted for this woman, they elected her to public office to represent them in congress. Seriously. And really, slit their wrists and become blood brothers? Does Michelle Bachmann worship Satan? That would certainly explain how she was elected...

And it's not just one crazy person, take a look around at the Republican Party today, it's nothing but frothing-at-the-mouth psychopaths. Let's ignore all the misinformed idiots at all these town hall meetings and focus on the people who actually wield some sort of authority in this country.

How about Louisiana Governor, Bobby Jindal, who claims he performed an exorcism on a young woman when he was in college? I've brought it up before, but it is a 100% true story, it's not some birther-esque conspiracy, Jindal himself has claimed that he performed an exorcism. I have to repeat that one more time - a sitting governor, an elected official, not only believes in the idea of exorcisms, he thinks he's performed one.

Then there's George W. Bush, who sent 4,000 brave men and women to die (and countless others to come back maimed), because God told him to invade Iraq. A twice-elected (well, one and half times elected) president started a war because "God" told him. I don't find that troubling that as an almost-atheist, I find it troubling in the same way that it disturbs me when I see a crazy person muttering about God as he stumbles down an alley. Yeah, we elected THAT guy to be president.

How about Representative John Shimkus (R-IL) who says we don't need to worry about climate change because only God decides when the world ends? That's right, ignore all the science and trash the place because it's not going to matter when God splits open the heavens and sends the Four Horsemen to destroy the world. Sounds like someone's interested in a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Then of course, there's Sarah Palin, who belongs to a church that can "pray the gay away" and allows "Pastor" Thomas Muthee to come preach. Palin claims she wouldn't have been elected governor had Muthee not "laid hands" upon her, as he prayed for Jesus to bless her with wealth and protect her from witches. Literal witches, broomstick-riding, cauldron-brewing WITCHES.

I know I've mentioned all these over the last few months in previous entries, but when I compile them all together, can you actually look at it and take these people seriously? It's not just them, there are many more loonies in the party and even more nutjobs that support them, so honestly, please tell me how this party has any credibility?

If I were to sit you down and tell you about a group of people whose leaders believed in witches, exorcisms, a supernatural apocalypse, thought God was speaking directly to them and then called on their members to slit their wrists and become blood brothers, what would you think? Republican Party? Religious cult? Is there really even a difference at this point?

Frustration

It's been two weeks since I've written anything, mainly because our current political climate has devolved into mind-numbing stupidity. Glenn Beck said the president has a "deep-seated hatred for white people," and joked about poisoning the Speaker of the House (all while his advertisers took their money and ran). Senator Chuck Grassley suggested that folks turn to Jesus Christ for "end of life counseling." And Sarah Palin emerged from the unemployment line to insinuate that President Obama wants to murder her Down Syndrome baby.

Ah yes, Citizen Avon Lady and her mythical "death panels," all this just a couple weeks after ordering the media to "quit making stuff up." In the latest round of Palin exploiting her children for political gain, she sold the idea that if we had a government-run health care system, the handicapped, the sick and the elderly will have the proverbial plug pulled on them. Of course, this is 100% false, but the "liberal media" (lol), in their quest to always look "objective," took the bait and actually reported on this nonsense.

It really is infuriating to watch a serious political debate get hijacked by the LOUD NOISES crowd. People like Sarah Palin have nothing to add to the discussion, so they play to their base of ignorant, uninformed numbskulls to make people scared of health care reform. This is true, someone actually stood up in one of these infamous town hall scream-a-thons and said "KEEP YOUR DAMN GOVERNMENT HANDS OFF MY MEDICARE!" This is the type of idiot that Sarah Palin is talking to. Now that may make me sound like one of those elitist lefties, but here's the deal: if you actually believe that "death panels" will be a part of health care reform, you don't get to talk. You clearly have no idea what's going on and you will add nothing to the discussion, so shut up and actually read something not from redstate.com or Sarah Palin's Facebook page.

We've let loudmouth morons like Beck, Palin, Limbaugh, Grassley and the residents of Wingnuttia dictate the direction of the health care debate. Because they began frothing at the mouth, the end of life consultations have been removed from the health care bill. That's right, the same people who called for federal interference in the Terri Schiavo debacle don't want you to have access to a consultation about a living will. That's all the "death panels" are, compensating doctors for talking to their patients about an optional living will. So in the unfortunate event that you or a loved one are unable to make a decision about treatment, your wishes will be carried out.

I have it on good authority that Sarah Palin's next Facebook note will be about how you shouldn't be an organ donor, because it's really just a government conspiracy to harvest your organs! Seriously though, the elimination of the end of life provisions is a very dangerous precedent. The spineless cowards in the Democratic Party have once again bent to the will of the lunatic fringe on the ultra far-right. By not standing their ground on this, their fillibuster-proof majority is worthless, all it takes is yelling and screaming from people who have no clue what they're talking about to shut down a bill. That's the Democratic Party I know, blowing the lead in the bottom of the 9th with two outs and no one on base.

Screaming at themselves

Before I begin, let me clarify that I'm not one to put much stock in polls, I don't think you can accurately represent a country of over 100 million voters by asking 1000 people a series of questions over the phone. Not saying that every poll is wrong, but don't put all your faith in them.

But with that said, Republicans can't shut up about polling these last few weeks. Why? Because Obama's approval rating is down, shocking that they're all over that. So for those folks who are dying to write off an entire presidency in six months because of one week's worth of polling, I want to share a poll of my own.

Political Party Affiliation by State - Gallup

There are currently 37 states that are considered "strongly Democrat" or "leaning Democrat" and you can add DC in there as well for a combined 350 electoral votes. How many are Republican strongholds? Four, with only one additional state "leaning" Republican. Those states are Alaska, Utah, Wyoming, Idaho and Alabama... with a combined 15 electoral votes between them. There you go, there's today's Republican Party, amazing where people can live nowadays.

Above: Ouch.

Naturally, this Gallup poll is not reflected by the way the "liberal media" (lol) covers the news. Just today, MSNBC gave actual airtime to "lawyer" Orly Taitz (yes, her name is Orly) to explain the so-called "Birther Movement" and why she's fighting to "prove" that Barack Obama wasn't really born in the United States. Just watch this video and see that this woman is a special brand of crazy; I mean there's crazy, and then there's Orly! But the Birfers, as I like to call them, have somehow gotten their stupid cause picked up by the mainstream media the last couple weeks and it's still getting reported on even though it has been repeatedly confirmed that Barack Obama was born in Hawaii.

But it's not just the Birfers, the media's letting various Republicans, wingnuts and lunatic fringers all over the networks to talk about whatever insanity is on their mind. Just yesterday, This Week with George Stephanopoulos hosted right-wing columnist Michelle Malkin, who's about as qualified to go on that show as I am, and let her just spew her Ann Coulter-lite vitriol. I still see Frank Gaffney pop up all over MSNBC, and he's a guy that thinks Saddam Hussein was not only behind 9/11, but the Oklahoma City Bombings as well. Even Sean Hannity managed to up his "OMG did he really just do that?"-factor by bringing on MARK FUHRMAN to discuss race relations in America... yes, that Mark Fuhrman, the same dirty cop from the OJ Simpson trial who we heard on tape talk about how much he enjoys beating black people.

Then there's John McCain, who seems to get a weekly interview with the news outlet of his choice. I challenge you to find me a Democrat that got as much airtime as McCain has in the six months after he lost an election. I know we sure as hell didn't see John Kerry, Al Gore or Michael Dukakis this much, but somehow that "liberal media" (lol again) seems to find all the time in the world for ol' Johnny. Memo to the media: McCAIN LOST! Overwhelmingly! That means we didn't like his ideas six months ago, why should we have to hear about them now?

So right now the Republicans have less support than the Whigs, yet they still dominate the news cycle to promote their agenda of LOUD NOISES! They don't have the ability to engage in rational discussion (just listen to talk radio), they have no solutions for the nation's problems (just watch C-Span), all they have left to offer is obstruction. They can't tell us why we shouldn't have health care reform, why gay people shouldn't be allowed to marry or why we should take Sarah Palin seriously, so all they do is just ratchet up the crazy and force us to listen. Remember that next time you see footage of Glenn Beck's latest stunt - which will probably be something like setting the American Flag on fire - the GOP is nothing but an increasingly irrelevant political party trying to do anything to get attention. Like a dying television show desperate for ratings, the Republican Party has jumped the shark, the networks just haven't figured it out yet.

Keystone Media

Need any evidence that race is still an issue in America? Especially in the parts that Rush Limbaugh's fat ass occupies? Just take a look at the case involving Harvard Professor, Henry "Skip" Gates and the media frenzy surrounding it.

Long story short, Mr. Gates was trying to get into his home after locking himself out or his door jamming (I've read both accounts), then a cop strolls along "investigating a break-in" and winds up arresting Gates. A black man arrested because someone thought he was breaking and entering... his own house. In the interest of full disclosure, Mr. Gates was actually charged with disorderly conduct, although I'd be a little disorderly as well if someone tried arresting me for breaking into my own home, especially when I'm already annoyed at the fact that I'm locked out.

The problem was amplified when President Obama was asked about the incident and called the arresting officer's actions "stupid." The police are now demanding an apology from the president. Really? An apology for being called stupid? Here's a tip, if you don't want to be called stupid, don't do something stupid. Just be glad he didn't call the guy a "fucking moron," you fucking morons.

Of course, if Gates were white, everyone would be laughing at Officer James Crowley and rightfully calling him stupid for arresting a guy trying to get inside his own home. But since Mr. Gates is black and this has become a national news story, all the closet racists are slithering out from under their rocks and onto Fox News/talk radio to say everything short of "this uppity black should've known his place."

Looking at the case, I highly doubt that Officer Crowley himself is a racist, but he did something incredibly stupid. Whether or not this was a case of racial profiling or complete ineptitude, you have to be a pretty bad at your job to arrest someone for breaking into their own house. The leeches (Rush Limbaugh) that are trying to turn this into a political issue are the same subhumans that have been pouring gas on America's racial tensions since Barack Obama became a national figure. As their numbers continue to dwindle, it seems Republicans have no problem being the party of nothing but angry white men.

I'm afraid we have to amputate

After having this charge leveled at me numerous times in post-9/11 America, I have to ask it in reverse, do the Republicans hate America? Honestly, I don't think that's true, they certainly love their version of America: polluted, paved and full of pipelines. No, in reality, I think it's more accurate to say that the Republican Party hates Americans.

See, they like their Americans like they like America, polluted. They're comfortable with the fact that the nation is full of people who are fat and stupid. They certainly don't have any plans to fix health care and if it weren't for stupid people, they'd have no party leaders. In case you missed it, a RNC memo came out this week detailing how the Republicans should kill health care reform and "break" Obama. This is how they view the world folks, you are not important; your well-being, the well-being of your children, it's irrelevant to them. Your health, your life, it's a commodity, a business, and as long as they have any say in the matter (as well as those "Blue Dog" Democrats), that's what it will continue to be. All that matters to today's Republican Party is money and votes, and if that means they have to stand in the way of America's progress to get those things, then that's okay.

Sounds harsh, but take a look at their reasoning behind opposing Universal Health Care:

"Oh it'll cost too much!"
Yeah, never mind that taxpayers already pay more health costs than any other nation, yet we're the only modernized nation without some form of universal health care.

"Quality of care will drop!"
The WHO ranks us 37th in the world in terms of overall care, right between Costa Rica and Slovenia. In terms of life expectancy, we rank 45th, just beating out Cyprus, but below Bermuda. Where do we rank on infant mortality? 32nd. Yeah, we're doing a bang-up job with quality of care.

"There will be an government bureaucrat between you and your doctor!"
As opposed to the insurance company bureaucrat between you and your doctor now? A company stooge whose job it is to keep their costs down, even if it comes at the expense of your health.

"You'll wait forever for treatment!"
Because normally you just fly right through the emergency room and are out of there in no time! As for appointments, I can't even get a goddamn dentist appointment within the next six months.

"The government can't run anything right!"
Yeah, because we still have Republicans. When your party runs on a platform of government being inefficient, maybe you shouldn't be running for positions in government. If we got rid of these roadblocks, we might actually get some work done. And that's really what it comes down to, if you want health care reform, it's time to rid our government of the Republican Party. Like a malignant tumor, we need to surgically remove them with our votes every election cycle.


*PS - bow to my AWESOME MS Paint skills!!!

Sonia v. Sarah

Don't worry, this one isn't mine, it's just the most brilliant skewering of GOP Frankenstein that I've ever read. Why is it that the same Republicans that have such an issue with Sonia Sotomayor are Sarah Palin's biggest fans?

I used to think that, after the debacle of the Bush years, the train wreck of Sarah Palin and the Obama rout, the Republican Party would recover its sanity and regroup. Clearly, I was wrong. People who argue that Sarah Palin is good for America while Sonia Sotomayor is a threat are obviously out of their minds.

Ouch. You can read the full column right here

"Liberal Media" Strikes Again!

Take a look at this picture of Sarah Palin, soon to be former governor of Alaska. The biggest loss from that news is that I won't get to call her "Governor Avon Lady" anymore, but according to Time Magazine, I guess I should start calling her "The Renegade." Yeah, that pesky "liberal media" is at it again, tearing down poor Sarah Palin by giving her all sorts of press, taking photos of her looking all nifty on a pier and giving her a super cool moniker like "Renegade." Lorenzo Lamas' career is spinning in its grave.

How does Webster's Dictionary define the term "renegade?"

an individual who rejects lawful or conventional behavior

Well, I guess considering her numerous ethics complaints and the fact that she's out of her goddamn mind, maybe Time is onto something. But that's the literal definition, the media is portraying this as some sort of brilliant scheme that's prepping her for the 2012 election, they're even saying she's taking "the road less traveled," like she's the subject of a friggin' Robert Frost poem. Trust me, Quitty McGee ain't that deep. "Renegade" implies some sort of badass trait, something that sets her apart from the pack, puh-lease.

Sarah Palin is not a renegade, she's not all "mavericky," she's just another Republican. Someone tried to tell me the other day that she's the "new flavor" of politics... apparently the only flavor that person is familiar with is mushrooms because you'd have to be high to believe it. Sarah Palin is plain old Republican vanilla with a couple colorful sprinkles on top, she's the culmination of everything that's sucked about the Republican Party since Nixon. Take your pick: ethically corrupt, moral superiority, extreme arrogance, shallow, greedy, condescending, out of touch, privacy-invading, anti-intellectual, anti-science, anti-civil liberties, pro-war, and most important of all, a hypocrite. Sarah Palin takes all the worst qualities of the Republican Party and rolls it into one winking package.

Yes, she's worse than Bush. Say what you will about W, but "quitter" would never enter the discussion. After all the memos that have been released, I honestly have a bit of sympathy for Bush these days. Sure, he's still the worst president ever, but he just seems so gullible and naive, there's almost this innocent quality about him. I feel like W was a decent human being who thought he was doing good, but was surrounded by cretins like Cheney, Rumsfeld, Gonzalez, etc.

Palin, on the other hand, is all of Bush's worst qualities, mixed with the political ambition of Karl Rove and all the other criminals. She's dumb as a rock (apologies to rocks), a Jesus™ freak, and someone who thinks with her gut rather than her pea-sized brained like Bush; but then she's also a master manipulator, vindictive and just plain nasty like ol' Turd Blossom.

Renegade? Hardly. This woman is the GOP's Frankenstein.

Bailin' Palin

Because one blog just isn't enough to celebrate this glorious occasion. I've gotten a bit of negative feedback on my comments about the soon ex-governor of Alaska, had my mental state called into question and have been mocked for writing a blog by another blogger. Seriously. Since you probably have a life, I'm sure you missed the Wingnut Defense Fund (WDF) come out and express their support for Sarah Palin abandoning the people of Alaska. Apparently resigning with 17 months to go in your first term is a good thing, who knew?

I have to admit, I was somewhat surprised by all these apologists coming out of the woodwork, Republicans typically throw their people under the bus at the first sign of trouble: Bobby Jindal was quickly forgotten after that abysmal speech he gave a few months back, everyone's so disappointed Mark Sanford's job after he went hiking the Appalachian Trail (my new favorite euphemism), Rush Limbaugh even said "he could've been our JFK," all but admitting that it was over for South Carolina's governor; but they're not willing to give up Sarah Palin. Oh no, even though she gave a mind-numbing, incoherent speech loaded with bullshit and hypocrisy, the Palin-drones just can't let it go. Like someone about to lose a family member, I believe these poor souls have entered the Five Stages of Grief. Sadly, most of them are stuck in the first two stages, anger & denial. Just find any political discussion on the internet, you'll see what I mean.

But speaking of denial, I did want to share one hilarious quote that I just read a few moments ago. This is from someone trying to convince me that Sarah Palin is a great speaker who actually has a clue what she's talking about:

"I've listened to her speak. She is able to communicate well regarding most any topic that is thrown at her, better than most politicians."

Pardon me while I burst into uncontrollable laughter. I've listened to her speak quite a bit as well and I hear a complete buffoon. It's like the time Bush tried to talk about tribal sovereignty every single time she gives a non-softball interview. Of course, it's hard to find a real interview post-election since she talks to the media less than reclusive celebrities, even though she's a sitting governor. But yeah, listen to any of her interviews during the campaign, there's really only one word to describe her: dummy.

She sounds like a middle school student who has to give a speech to the class, but forgot her note cards and is trying to remember all the neat buzzwords that she learned while researching the subject. She has no clue what she's talking about and she thinks she can get by with cute little winks or just dodging the question.

She's a bigger idiot than Bush, and that takes skill. At least with Bush, as dumb as he was, he seemed like a genuine person who cared about those closest to him and struggled with his decisions... not at all like Palin. Governor Avon Lady is 100% sure of herself 100% of the time and anyone who disagrees isn't a "Real" American. She exploits her children at any given opportunity for political gain (I've seen Bristol Palin give more interviews in one year than the Bush twins did in eight) and she's a vindictive, spiteful, and disingenuous political hack. Sarah Palin is a complete and utter joke; Alaska, America and the world are better off without her in any elected office.


And now for some bonus Palin hilarity. After calling politics a "bloodsport" and threatening to sue anyone who writes anything bad about her, let's hop in our DeLorean and see how Sarah Palin felt about Hillary Clinton's "whining" in March 2008:

Governor Avon Lady to resign

First, the good news:

ANCHORAGE, Alaska -- Gov. Sarah Palin will resign her office in a few weeks, she said during a news conference at her Wasilla home Friday morning.

I promised myself I wouldn't cry, but these are happy tears! And I'm going to try to get through this blog even though I am at a loss for words... I'm just so happy!

July 4 is tomorrow, so I guess this is Palin's early birthday present to America? You know, I've said a lot of nasty things about her over the last year or so, but I have to give her credit for knowing exactly what to get everyone. The people of Alaska must be pretty thrilled too, maybe they'll finally have a governor who isn't ethically corrupt, morally corrupt, hypocritical or just plain stupid. But of course, what does this mean for their security? Perhaps Sarah can remain on in some capacity to keep an eye on Russia?

But as I think about it, it's one of those things that seems too good to be true, why is she resigning now? I've already seen this sparking rumors that this is so she can gear up for a presidential run... are you kidding? You can't just resign barely midway through your first term as governor and expect to run in an election that is three years away. I suppose stranger things have happened, but this should effectively kill her political career, unless she wants to be mayor of Wasilla again. If this is some desperate attempt to get attention for 2012, who would take her seriously? How could we trust a President Palin to not just run away when things got too hard? Economy in shambles? Wars? Terrorism? "Thanks, but no thanks!"

But then there's the flipside, potential scandal? Please, please, PLEASE tell me that the whole Argentinian mistress thing is a cover and it's actually Palin's Appalachian Trail that Mark Sanford has been hiking. C'mon, that would be the greatest political scandal in the history of political scandals! Plus, Sanford said the mistress was his soul mate, I can't think of a better woman for him than a brain dead, ultra-religious, neoconservative hypocrite.

Whatever the reason, in the midst of a major economic recession, two wars, and a country that's still stinging from eight years of a complete imbecile running the country, it's nice to get some good news. It's hard to believe it's been less than a year since John McCain unleashed her upon us, but hopefully Sarah Palin has finally got on the Bridge to Nowhere and we'll never have to deal with her again.

FOX News: US Needs another terrorist attack.

Absolutely disgusting:



Why does Glenn Beck hate America? And FOX News is just as guilty by giving him a platform to agree with this disgusting rhetoric. Sponsors should pull their advertising from FOX and Glenn Beck should be fired... this goes beyond your typical idiot right-wing fear/hate mongering, this is calling for an attack on the United States of America simply because your guy didn't win an election.

It's time for right-wingers to grow up and accept the fact that sometimes you lose, but that's not an excuse to say the only way to fix it is for people to die. Seriously, this is the kind of lunacy usually reserved for whoever is behind the conspiracy on this season of 24. But of course, we all know Republicans get most of their policies from whatever Jack Bauer is up to. How anyone can take these scumbags seriously is beyond me.

Bill Maher > Pundits

This is why Bill Maher is smarter than the vast majority of the talking heads that infect TV news. Maybe it's not even that he's smarter, perhaps he just has the balls to speak the truth and doesn't twist himself into a partisan pretzel.



And he's absolutely right about all of it. Obama is trying too hard to please the Republicans... screw the Republicans! They had their chance, they broke America and left it for someone else to fix. That someone else is our current president and he'd be better suited ignoring these nimrods than trying to get us all to come together and "compromise," that's code for "do what the Republicans want."

And don't take this as me being partisan, watch: screw the Democrats too! The Democrats are so obsessed with becoming Republican Lite due to this myth of America being a "center-right" country, all they're doing is just slowing progress. As Maher said, we have no progressive party in this country, any true liberal politicians are looked at as jokes and our lazy media is too busy worrying about the latest adventures of Governor Avon Lady to do anything about it.

Since Maher brought up Sarah Palin in that interview, let's make fun of her. I wanted to write a blog about her "feud" with David Letterman, but then the thing just got so ridiculous that I wouldn't be able to write anything without putting my fist through my monitor. If you're curious about my feelings, here's a quick summary that will keep my blood pressure down:

-The joke was funny and every other late night host has told similar ones.
-John McCain - Palin's runningmate - once called Chelsea Clinton "ugly."
-If Sarah Palin wasn't such a shitty parent, the joke wouldn't have been made in the first place. These jokes aren't about making fun of the children, they're about making fun of the Governor for being a hypocrite.
-Palin once again exploits her children for political gain.
-Palin made accusations about Letterman that were far more offensive than his joke.
-Shame on David Letterman for apologizing.
-Palin should stay in Alaska and do her damn job... or at least only come to "Real" America.
-Sarah Palin is a friggin' moron.

That about sums it up. I'm surprised I made it through that without using the c-word.

So yeah... President Obama, show us a little more Candidate Obama and don't worry about the Republicans, they're too busy killing their party from within. And put Sarah Palin on some kind of no-fly list while you're at it. It'll be good for America and the wildlife she shoots from her helicopter.

Domestic Terrorism

We were warned, but the right-wing media didn't want to listen. Two times in two weeks, terrorism on American soil, but clowns like Joe Scarborough just laughed off the warnings. How funny is it now, Joe?



Why can't the neocons just distance themselves from these murderers? Instead, they try to project it onto the Democrats, even going so far as to call the Holocaust Museum shooter a "leftist." James von Brunn (the shooter) called President Obama a "creation of the Jews," who was coming for his guns. Yeah, real bleeding-heart liberal.

Have the Republicans officially lost their minds? Instead of just coming out, condemning the tragedy and moving on, they have to play the blame game? Is Rush Limbaugh truly so desperate for attention that he thinks simply saying Von Brunn is a "leftist" will make it true? Anyone with half of a functioning brain (okay, that eliminates 90% of elected Republicans and right-wing commentators) can see this guy's political ideology is more in-line with hardcore Libertarianism. Not the fiscal conservative who wants to smoke pot Libertarian, I'm talking about the Libertarian living in a bunker surrounded by gold and various assault rifles.

Von Brunn is not a Republican, and no one is even suggesting he is. The reason the Republicans are so defensive right now is because they threw a fit over the DHS report that was 100% accurate. Republicans tried to use it as a wedge issue and make it sound like Barack Obama and Janet Napolitano were targeting anyone who identifies themselves as conservative. Never mind the report was authorized by the Bush Administration, the neocons saw it as a chance to gain some political points and now it has exploded in their collective face.

While the adults were talking about real threats facing our country, the Republicans were turning it into a spectacle, trying to find something (anything) that could maybe get them back in the driver's seat in Washington. By coming out against the report, Republicans inadvertantly aligned themselves with people who would shoot up a museum or assassinate a doctor in a church. Make no mistake, the museum shooting and the assassination of Dr. Tiller are acts of terrorism, but instead of fighting it, the Republicans continue to play political games.

The crazies are getting restless

Usually it's just fun to laugh at wingnuts; they're generally harmless, spewing shit so idiotic that no one in their right mind would ever pay attention to them. Whether it's Obama's birth certificate, his choice in mustard, gay marriage leading to the downfall of civilization, or they're named Glenn Beck... they're usually just silly old crazy people, like the kind you'd find pushing around a shopping cart, but not in a grocery store. Unfortunately, the ultra right-wing is growing increasingly frustrated as they become increasingly irrelevant and as a result, they're becoming more dangerous.

All this psychotic rage seemed to begin around the end of the presidential campaign when the McCain/Palin events became glorified hate rallies. We all remember McCain reining in the crazy old woman who called Obama an "Arab," but Governor Avon Lady didn't stop fanning the flames of wingnuttery when she started insinuating that her opponent was a "terrorist." With policemen (in uniform) and various religious leaders to help spread the smears as well, they set the table for the crazies to come feast.

Aligning with psychopaths is a lot like opening Pandora's Box, there is no going back, the toothpaste is out of the tube, insert other cliché here. Obama won the election, but the Republicans had all these new found loonies shuffling around aimlessly like the mindless zombies they are, so they all got together and had themselves a little Tea Party. The tea parties were hijacked from the Libertarian movement and turned into campaign events, funded by neocons like Newt Gingrich and Dick Armey. The teabagging did nothing except show how hypocritical and out of touch the Republican Party was with America; they were essentially complaining that they had to pay for the tow truck after a night of drunk driving resulting in wrapping their Mercedes around a telephone pole. But that didn't stop the crazies from showing up, oh no... the teabaggers weren't just coming to talk about taxes, they had plenty of wingnutty goodness to go around.

But then it got scary, unlike when McCain reined in the racists at those campaign rallies, the Republicans embraced the tea parties and we got a glance at just how fucking insane this party has become. Minnesota congresswoman Michele Bachmann wanted her contstituents "armed and dangerous," Texas Governor Rick Perry talked about seceding from the union and Republican strategist (and complete scumbag) Dick Morris, took a page out of G. Gordon Liddy's handbook and said, “Those crazies in Montana who say, ‘we’re going to kill ATF agents because the UN’s going to take over’ - well, they’re beginning to have a case.”

All this crazy boiled over earlier this week when Dr. George Tiller, a doctor who helped women and their families through an agonizing decision, was assassinated by a right-wing extremist. And then, several sick and demented psychopaths celebrated. I'm not going to get into the abortion debate here - if you agree with a woman's right to choose then I'd just be preaching to the choir; if you disagree, neither of us will convince the other otherwise - but if you think Dr. Tiller was performing these late-term abortions just because the mother "changed her mind," then you're a fucking moron. Pro-"life," but only if it's unborn... grown adults are apparently fair game, and killing them in church is a-okay too. Crazy and hypocritical... a dangerous combination.

But it doesn't stop there... in the last two days, a man is roaming around somewhere in the country, armed to the teeth and carrying a small fortune, plotting to assassinate the President of the United States. Today, a different man was arraigned in New York after plotting to "blow up" President Obama and Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor. Mix this in with all these random shooting sprees that have been popping up all over the place and one might think this country has officially lost its goddamn mind.

A lot of people have placed part of the blame on Fox News, especially Bill O'Reilly, for the assassination of Dr. Tiller. As much as I'd like to blame them specifically, it goes much deeper than that. This culture of fear and paranoia has been growing since 9/11, partially because the Republicans have exploited it for political gain, partially because we still have a lot of racists and bigots living in this country and partially because we'll always have people who are just plain bonkers. That Homeland Security report about right-wing extremists (the one the Republicans went nuts over even though it was authorized by the Bush Administration) was spot-on, and I worry that this problem is only going to get worse before it gets better.

There is no argument against gay marriage

If you follow this blog regularly, you know one of the most frequent topics is the issue of gay marriage. People tell me I shouldn't worry about it so much, I'm straight, why should I care, etc. The bottom line is the simple fact that the law applies to everyone equally or it applies to no one. The 14th Amendment of the United States Constitution guarantees equal protection under the law and the 1967 Supreme Court case Loving v. Virginia made it explicitly clear that marriage is a basic civil right for all human beings.

I generally shy away from using this kind of language, but not with this topic: there is absolutely no logical or legal reason why gay marriage should remain illegal. None. I've outlined this in multiple blogs and any time the subject comes up, I always ask for a reason to oppose it and no one can do it. Any argument I've ever heard can be immediately debunked by anyone with even the most basic understanding of law and state-sanctioned marriage. My highest education is learning how to talk for a living and I can counter any argument raised by people who oppose same-sex marriage. Imagine what would happen if two brilliant lawyers tackle the subject...

Oh wait, they have. Ted Olson and David Boies, who argued against each other in the infamous Supreme Court case, Bush v. Gore, have teamed up to take this fight to the federal level. Finally! It's time to stop worrying about individual states going through a long, drawn-out process and end this nonsense once and for all. Here's a great video of Olson & Boies appearing on Hardball, how can you possibly argue against the points they raise?

Dick.

Okay, I've tried controlling my anger, but I can't take it anymore: Dick Cheney... shut the hell up. I really don't like throwing around things like this, but he may very well be the worst person who has ever served in any kind of public office. I don't even know if I can call him a person, he is walking evil. And the media must stop treating his every word as if it has any meaning or relevance to our national dialogue. It's bad enough that President Obama continues to move to the right (and he was already in the center to begin with), but now the media gives Cheney a platform to push the nation even further to the land of insanity.

Now I could just end this blog there and call it a day, but I'm sure some wingnut will barge in and say something to the effect of "why do you liberals hate dissent? Dick Cheney is just voicing his opinion, why do you want to take away his free speech?!" or something equally stupid, so allow me to elaborate.

Dick Cheney is in no position to offer his opinion on anything. Sure, he can mutter whatever he wants from his undisclosed location, but for the media to give this man attention is like asking Richard Nixon about Jimmy Carter's ethics. The Cheney Administration (since it's becoming more and more clear that it was not the Bush Administration) systematically wrecked this country on just about every level. They killed our economy, they ruined our reputation with our allies, they sent 5000 brave men and women to die for nothing in Iraq, and yes, they made us less safe. Furthermore, when it comes to issues of national security, everything that Dick Cheney ever said over the course of his "vice" presidency was demonstrated to be 100% wrong:

"There's a link between Iraq and al-Qaeda"
"Saddam Hussein has weapons of mass destruction"
"The war will be over in six weeks... six months, tops"
"The war will pay for itself"
"We'll be greeted as liberators"
"Bush kept us safe"
"Waterboarding isn't torture"
"Waterboarding saved lives"
"Ending waterboarding makes America less safe"

Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Wrong.

Plus the dozens more I can't remember off the top of my head. On the issue of torture, all of the information that we gained from those who were waterboarded came before they were tortured. The only reason these men were subjected to the "enhanced interrogation" methods was to create a link between Iraq and al-Qaeda. Yes, the Vice President of the United States authorized torture to falsify evidence in order to mislead the American people to go along with the Iraq War. Imagine a police officer planting evidence on a suspect, then multiply it by the 5000 lives that were lost in Iraq... that blood is on Cheney's hands.

Between the torture and the outing of a CIA agent for political gain, Dick Cheney doesn't belong on television, he belongs in a prison cell. That's the only reason I can imagine why we've seen him more in the last two months than we have in the last eight years, he's trying to keep himself out of jail. If he becomes a vocal opponent of the current president, any investigation into his war crimes will appear to be politically-motivated and Washington will turn into a bigger circus than it already is. Way to go, Dick... politicizing the Justice Department even when you're out of office, that takes skill.

It's obvious that Dick has no other real motivations behind this other than to save his own skin. If it were strictly out of concern for his country, he would've ran for president; of course he would've been demolished since he has the lowest approval ratings of just about any individual politician in the history of the nation, but if he's THAT concerned, he should've went for it. If Bush-era policies truly made America more safe, it would've been Cheney's duty to the country to attempt to continue them. But no, he's just fine going on all the talk shows, smearing legitimate war heroes like Colin Powell (how many deferments did you get, Dick?) and continuing the fear mongering that plagued this nation since the day after 9/11. The American people have rejected the politics of fear and the politics of the worst administration in the history of this nation, it's time the media do the same.

Supreme Exaggeration

Just a quick little thing I wanted to share with you today. I was torturing myself, watching Fox News (nothing else is on Sunday afternoons!) and they just had an anchor on there say something to the effect of "the most controversial issues of our time, abortion and gay marriage, will be in the hands of one person, the next Supreme Court nominee."

I know it's always an issue when the Supreme Court comes up, but did the folks over at Fox forget that we've already had the abortion debate? Roe v. Wade put the subject to bed, at least in terms of legality. Obviously people are trying to overturn it, but the decision on abortion doesn't rest solely in one person's hands, we've already had people make that decision... 36 years ago. If we want to travel down that road again, it's going to take a long time and go through a lot of people before it even reaches the Supreme Court, so saying the decision is in the hands of one person is beyond ridiculous.

Sensationalism from Fox News? I'm stunned!

Sinking to new lows

Gay marriage has been legalized in five states: Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, Vermont and Maine; New York and New Hamsphire could be added to the list very soon. So here we are, 10% of the states in the union recognize same-sex marriage and society has not collapsed onto itself. Straight marriages aren't threatened, the "family unit" has not come unraveled and the only difference seems to be that gay people are enjoying (or will soon be enjoying) the same rights as everyone else. That is of course, if you don't pay attention to the right-wing, who have lost their collective shit. Take a look:



Watching that video makes me literally nauseous, I'm not kidding. To paraphrase the video, when I have to listen to scumbags like Michael Savage, Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, Glenn Beck, and Pat Robertson, I want to puke. These are despicable human beings and they should be ashamed of themselves (if they had shame) for spreading this kind of bigotry. "The Gay Gestapo?" Seriously? Yeah, God forbid someone call you out on your hate and intolerance, you phony moral crusaders. A few months back, I said that people who make these kind of arguments are subhuman and it's sad that I even need to discuss it now, but apparently the wingnuts aren't going to let it go. These smears, lies and distortions are all patently false and I'm going to put these disgusting arguments to rest right now.

Gay marriage is not going to lead to polygamy. As it stands right now, there is nothing illegal about a married man or woman bringing a third, fourth or fifteenth partner into their home. Many people live in open marriages and if they choose to do that, that is their own decision as consenting adults. But the state legally recognizing a plural marriage will lead to several complications that would not be present in a monogamous gay or straight marriage. We provide tax incentives to married couples, if the state recognized a plural marriage, those incentives would double with each additional spouse, which would create all kinds of tax issues. Welfare and immigration abuse would skyrocket; we already have enough problems with people getting married simply to secure immigration status, now imagine if someone could turn it into a business. A man could theoretically charge immigrants to marry him so they could become citizens of this country. Also, think of how messy divorce is in America when it's just two people, imagine a court wasting time, resources and taxpayer money trying to figure out paternity rights, division of property, alimony and inheritance for three, four, or ten partners... the cons far outweigh the pros for legalizing polygamy.

Gay marriage will not lead to man-child marriage for one simple reason, pedophilia is illegal. Children are not in any position to give legal consent, and even if they think they would want to marry an adult, that's why we have statutory rape laws in place. Gay marriage, just like straight marriage, will be between consenting adults.

Despite what Bill O'Reilly fantasizes, gay marriage will not lead to a man marrying a turtle, bestiality is illegal. Animals have none of the legal rights that humans do, they cannot enter into any legal contract, including marriage. Having sex with an animal is animal abuse, and much like with pedophilia, animals cannot give legal consent, so there's no legal argument to be made here.

These concerns being raised are completely insane and it further proves the bigotry of those who oppose gay marriage. Yes, if you use these arguments, you are a bigot, plain and simple. They're trying to equate homosexuality with various perversions and fetishes, to give the impression that there's something wrong with a gay person. There's nothing wrong with gay people, but I think the above video shows the only perverts in this debate are the twisted deviants who make these kind of arguments.

Spoiler alert: when you support bigotry, you'll be on the wrong side of history. Just like our treatment of the American Indian, our usage of slavery, suppression of women's rights, Jim Crow laws, and the internment of Japanese citizens during World War II, the fact that we even needed to have this debate about gay rights will be looked back on with shame and disgust. Gay marriage will be legal in this country, hopefully sooner than later, but it will happen... You can't stop social progress, those who try will always lose.

Miss Bigot

I really didn't want to write about this, I didn't want to give her any more attention, she's already got way more than she deserves, but then "Miss California" Carrie Prejean just had to go and say this:

I felt as though Satan was trying to tempt me in asking me this question. And then God was in my head and in my heart saying, "Do not compromise this. You need to stand up for me and you need to share with all these people . . . you need to witness to them and you need to show that you're not willing to compromise that for this title of Miss USA." And I knew right here that it wasn't about winning. It was about being true to my convictions.

Yep... Satan's fault. Couldn't possibly be the fact that you're a closed-minded bigot, that pesky Satan was tempting you at a beauty pageant! So apparently if you support gay marriage, you're doing the devil's work. Wow. You stay classy Christian conservatives!

This false sense of importance from evangelicals never ceases to amaze me. Yes, you're so important than Satan personally chose to tempt you with a question about gay marriage at the Miss USA pageant. I'm sorry, but when you say things like that, you should probably be committed to a mental institution. This isn't morality, you're just crazy. And while I'm on the subject doesn't the far-right already have enough intellectually-challenged, beauty pageant losers running around spreading their wacky religious beliefs?

Let me be clear, I couldn't possibly care any less about this whole "feud" (I'm rolling my eyes as I type that) with Perez Hilton. I think the world would be a better place without Perez Hilton's celebrity gossip and the Miss USA pageant, both things are complete wastes of time and I can't fathom how anyone could give a shit about either one of them. Seriously, what purpose do beauty pageants serve? Much like how there isn't a single reason to oppose gay marriage, I don't think there's a single reason to support beauty pageants.

Anyway, my problem isn't with her response to the question, it's with Prejean seizing an opportunity for fifteen minutes of fame, hopping on the homophobic bandwagon to promote the National Organization for Marriage. Much like Joe Wurzelbacher, Carrie Prejean is a know-nothing nobody. Her opinion is no more valid than mine (although I do have the ability to speak in complete sentences) yet no one can attack her because she just stated her opinion? Please. She's whining about her freedom of speech, but I got news for you, freedom of speech doesn't mean anything you say gets to go unchallenged. The Grand Wizard of the KKK has an opinion, that doesn't mean people don't get to call him a racist.

This vapid bimbo is nothing more than Anita Bryant 2.0, but unfortunately, no one has hit her in the face with a pie yet. Hiding behind her disgusting interpretation of Christianity, Prejean will continue to spread her bigotry because it gives her the attention she desperately seeks. Making yourself a star at the expense of someone else's rights, I guess a pretty face can't cover up an ugly soul.

Poutrage

Unsurprisingly, today's talking point from the right-wing media is that comedian, Wanda Sykes went too far in her speech Saturday night at the White House Correspondent's Dinner. Sykes jabbed at Rush Limbaugh, mocking him for his comments about wanting Obama to fail, saying it was borderline treason, she hopes his kidneys fail and that he was supposed to be the 20th hijacker on 9/11, but was so strung out on Oxycontin that he missed his flight. The White House issued a statement today saying 9/11 was off-limits, which isn't surprising, but the conservatives still aren't letting it go, saying all her attacks on Rush were over the line... have these people never actually listened to Limbaugh? Sykes was tame! Let's take a look at more glaring hypocrisy from the right:

Jokingly calling Limbaugh treasonous was over the line, yet Ann Coulter is free to write a book called Treason: Liberal Treachery from the Cold War to the War on Terrorism and Rush is free to call the president a thug.

Sykes "crossed the line" with hoping for Limbaugh's kidneys to fail. I guess some people see it as poor taste to make light of an illness, but that didn't stop Rush Limbaugh from mocking Michael J. Fox for having Parkinson's Disease. Or Ted Kennedy's brain tumor.

And saying Rush Limbaugh was supposed to be the 20th hijacker is beyond the pale, but please ignore the fact that Rush just described Obama as "the follow-up to 9/11." Seriously... and that was just last month.

The fundamental difference here is that Wanda Sykes' performance was roast-style joking. Yes, it was edgy and controversial, but it was still comedy; I can't speak for Sykes, but I don't think she really wants Limbaugh's kidneys to fail and she obviously doesn't believe he was the 20th hijacker. Yet Rush Limbaugh says shit like this every single day and it only makes the news when it's really over the line.

All this uproar over Wanda Sykes is just more manufactured outrage from the masters of pretending to be offended. It's hilarious that the party that's always whining about left-wing "political correctness" is always the first to cry foul when someone hurts their wee little feelings. Here's the truth, the Republican Party is still pouting over the fact that they got their asses handed to them in the election, so they'll grasp at any straw they can to smear Democrats. Just look at the last few weeks of phony outrage: moaning about the unfair treatment of some beauty pageant bimbo that ran her mouth about gay marriage (even though she's clueless to the subject), attacking Obama's choice of mustard, and now Wanda Sykes making a couple mean jokes about someone who spews venom on a daily basis. Here's a tip to the right-wing smear machine, don't dish it out if you can't take it.

And just for some laughs at how absurd it is to defend Rush Limbaugh while calling Wanda Sykes harsh, here are some more of Rush's greatest hits:

"We are being told that we have to hope he succeeds, that we have to bend over, grab the ankles ... because his father was black."

"Liberal black politicians" envy Fidel Castro's "dictatorial power"

"Everybody knows it was the vacuum cleaner that liberated women more than the pill"

"I think the media has been very desirous that a black quarterback do well. They’re interested in black coaches and black quarterbacks doing well. I think there’s a little hope invested in [Donovan] McNabb and he got a lot of credit for the performance of his team that he really didn’t deserve."

Obama's Supreme Court pick will be "a teenage single mother, who's gay, is a lesbian, who's dirt poor, African-American, and disabled"

"AIDS was going to get really bad but it didn't"

For more on Rush Limbaugh's racism, sexism and generally stupidity, just check Media Matters.

Sean Hannity is great... for me to Poupon

I don't know if you've noticed, but occasionally Fox News is the funniest damn thing on television. Clearly they're not a real news network and their entire on-air staff is composed of the biggest nimrods in broadcast history, but it is a never-ending source of hilarity. If you can manage to watch the network without feeling a need to evacuate your bowels, did you catch Sean Hannity this week? Sean really skewered Barack Obama this time, he caught the president - on camera - ordering a hamburger... with spicy mustard! THE HORROR! Yes friends, this is what the Republican Party has reduced itself to... mocking Obama because of his "fancy burger."

But Vannity wasn't alone, Laura Ingraham joined the promotion of "Dijongate" (seriously), "I don't even like the way the man orders a hamburger. ... What kind of man orders a cheeseburger without ketchup but Dijon mustard?" Apparently, Ms. Ingraham is unaware of the fact that this is America, where you can get a hamburger made out of a fucking donut, there's nothing we WON'T put on a burger.

USA! USA! USA!

Never mind the fact that "spicy mustard" is available in every supermarket in the country and I guarantee you can get some form of it (or elitist Dijon) at the vast majority of restaurants in this country. Even All-American company, French's sells a spicy mustard. OMG! Commie Socialists have invaded our condiments! Next thing you know, Obama will be making us put Worcestershire sauce on our hot dogs!

Fox and the other clowns from the right-wing propaganda machine are free to waste their airtime however they see fit, but really, this? Look, I know you're desperate to make fun of the guy after Bush gave us so much ammunition over the years, but just accept it, Republicans aren't funny. It's okay, you're the curmudgeon party, you're not supposed to be funny. Relish in the fact that you're a bunch of angry old white men shouting at kids on the lawn, it's what Dick Cheney does! Embrace your inner Dick, it suits you.