Friday, July 3, 2009

Governor Avon Lady to resign

First, the good news:

ANCHORAGE, Alaska -- Gov. Sarah Palin will resign her office in a few weeks, she said during a news conference at her Wasilla home Friday morning.

I promised myself I wouldn't cry, but these are happy tears! And I'm going to try to get through this blog even though I am at a loss for words... I'm just so happy!

July 4 is tomorrow, so I guess this is Palin's early birthday present to America? You know, I've said a lot of nasty things about her over the last year or so, but I have to give her credit for knowing exactly what to get everyone. The people of Alaska must be pretty thrilled too, maybe they'll finally have a governor who isn't ethically corrupt, morally corrupt, hypocritical or just plain stupid. But of course, what does this mean for their security? Perhaps Sarah can remain on in some capacity to keep an eye on Russia?

But as I think about it, it's one of those things that seems too good to be true, why is she resigning now? I've already seen this sparking rumors that this is so she can gear up for a presidential run... are you kidding? You can't just resign barely midway through your first term as governor and expect to run in an election that is three years away. I suppose stranger things have happened, but this should effectively kill her political career, unless she wants to be mayor of Wasilla again. If this is some desperate attempt to get attention for 2012, who would take her seriously? How could we trust a President Palin to not just run away when things got too hard? Economy in shambles? Wars? Terrorism? "Thanks, but no thanks!"

But then there's the flipside, potential scandal? Please, please, PLEASE tell me that the whole Argentinian mistress thing is a cover and it's actually Palin's Appalachian Trail that Mark Sanford has been hiking. C'mon, that would be the greatest political scandal in the history of political scandals! Plus, Sanford said the mistress was his soul mate, I can't think of a better woman for him than a brain dead, ultra-religious, neoconservative hypocrite.

Whatever the reason, in the midst of a major economic recession, two wars, and a country that's still stinging from eight years of a complete imbecile running the country, it's nice to get some good news. It's hard to believe it's been less than a year since John McCain unleashed her upon us, but hopefully Sarah Palin has finally got on the Bridge to Nowhere and we'll never have to deal with her again.

10 comments:

Rosie said...

This is one of those stories that's almost too good to be true. I have no doubt that Palin crazies everywhere are already printing up their "Palin for Prez 2012" signs. It's going to be a fun ride, no matter where it goes.

GM said...

You're nuts dude. Time to take your meds...You've really gone off the deep end.

GM said...

The blogosphere needs less angry high school dropsouts.

Razor said...

Yes, insult my intelligence by calling me a "dropsout." Oh righties, sometimes you just make it too easy.

And I'm the crazy one? It's your heroes who are the ones are going out on national television and delivering completely incoherent speeches about god knows what while their political aspirations collapse around them. Did you see that speech today? The woman's lost her damn mind!

Hey, I'll admit to being a bit goofy on here today, but sometimes you just gotta celebrate good news. The munchkins sang and danced when Dorothy's house fell on the Wicked Witch of the East; I'm doing a little singing and dancing of my own for the house falling on the Wicked Witch of the North's career. Ding Dong the Wicked Witch has resigned!

Rosie said...

This post is "going off the deep end"? Ha! Are you fucking kidding me? This post is tame compared to what could be written about Palin.

GM said...

Silly lefties. When you're not busy mooching off the government you're writing crazy blog posts about your favorite obsessions.

Then again some of your heroes are Michael Moore and Keith Olbermann..so you guys have a high appreciate for crazzzzzzzzzzzzzyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Bwhahahah

GM said...

P.s. I'm sure Sarah Palin will survive not being governor of Alaska..There's more to life than politics.

Dare I say family, friends, and perhaps even living your own life are more important?

Razor said...

Dude... you write a blog. Thank you for proving why "republican hypocrisy" is tagged in almost every blog I write.

And if there's more to life than politics - such as family, friends and one's own life - why did she get involved with politics in the first place? Why did she agree to enter the national stage with John McCain last year? I thought that was her big selling point, I thought she was so strong that she could handle all the responsibilities?

Imagine if she were VP right now, would this be happening? She'd certainly be a lot more busy and under much more scrutiny, would she just abandon the country like she did the people of Alaska because she couldn't handle the pressure. She buckled like a pilgrim's shoe after 10 months in the national spotlight, imagine if she were Vice President... or President?!

...

Sorry, I had to go take a shower after imagining that last part.

Rosie said...

Gabriel, you're a fucking riot. Your blog is full of your "favorite obsessions." Why is it so hard for you to address the points instead of "attacking" the person making them? And for fuck's sake, can you at least come up with something more creative and original than Michael Moore and Keith Olbermann? How very 2005 of you.

We know you heart Sarah, but instead of sticking up for her you spew complete nonsense. So typical.

GM said...

Good ole Razor. You keep doing what you're doing. Preach onnnnnnnnn!